What size is that?

Shopping has never been a favorite activity of mine. Doesn't matter the type of shopping: clothing, grocery, shoes...you name it and I despised it. So when I realized that I really needed to go clothing shopping I put it off for a month or so. Last Saturday we helped my parents clean out their basement after it flooded and I overheard my mom and sister talking about going shopping. One of things I was dreading about shopping was going alone. So I asked if I could tag along. I LOVE spending time with my mom and sister and it had been quite a while since we were able to spend more than 10 minutes together. So I figured it might be fun in spite of the fact that we were doing one of my least favorite activities.

We met at the mall and I got there first so I stopped at Old Navy. My co-worker loves their workout gear and all my workout pants are too big so I figured it was a good place to start. I grabbed mediums off the rack, a size 8 pair of shorts (!) and a really pretty blue dress. Everything fit like it was made for me! Except the medium shirt was too big and I meant to grab a small but I forgot so I ended up not getting one. But the blue dress was AMAZING:

We then ventured over to Kohl's where I tried on more fun dresses. We discovered that this particular cut looked really good on me. So we kept finding more and more for me to try on. I was grabbing mediums once again because I really thought that is what I would need. My mom found this amazing black dress but the hanger said it was a small. I said I would at least try it on just in case it might fit. I had a BLAST trying on all those dresses! The mediums were all too big, and the smalls were fitting perfectly. The black dress was a tiny bit snug, but knowing I still have more to lose, I got it anyway:

Two of the dresses I found that fit perfectly were a size six! I haven't been a size six since high school! The pair of khaki capris I got were also a size 6. I was just in shock at the sizes I was trying on. I never thought I would ever fit something smaller than an 8. It was unreal to me. I had so much fun finding clothes that I felt great in. I also got some great deals on it all, so it ended up being a great experience! And I had soooo much fun hanging out with my mom and sister.

I got home and was laying out all my new stuff and saw that the belt on the black dress said "2" on it. I thought it must just be a labeling thing and didn't think much of it. When I went to actually hang it up in my closet I saw the tag on the dress that I thought was just a Small was, in fact, a size 2! SHUT THE FRONT DOOR!!! REALLY?!? Of course I justify it by saying it has to be a bigger size 2, but STILL! I was over the moon when I realized that! Never in my wildest imagination did I EVER think that I would fit that size! And the sad thing is, if we had noticed it was a 2 before I tried it on, I NEVER would have tried it on and I would have missed out!

I have enjoyed wearing my new dresses to work. I have been getting so many compliments and questions about my weight loss. I love having the confidence to wear clothes that make me feel amazing. I had a co-worker ask "what's with all the dresses" and my response is simply "because I can!". I feel great and I think that the way I dress really reflects how I feel about myself. I definitely enjoy my jeans and t-shirts still, and I still prefer to lounge around the house in yoga or compression pants, but I don't do it to hide my body anymore. Everything I wear is somehow flattering to my new shape. I am proud of how I look now. Proud of all the hard work I have put into myself finally coming to fruition. It won't be long before I have to go shopping again, and this time I will not be dreading it in the slightest. In fact, I can't wait to do it again!

A day of rest

I am intentionally skipping my workout tonight and I don't even feel guilty about it!

Part of the venture to seek a healthier me means I need to listen to body when it tells me I need to take a day. As long as it's only a day. I will be back at it tomorrow, picking up right where I left off. The 21 Day Fix doesn't have an actual rest day, only an active rest day where you do yoga. I have learned to really enjoy my day of stretching. However, after 3 weeks straight of no rest days, my body deserves one. So rather than pushing myself into a place that causes me to be frustrated because I am so exhausted I decided to let myself rest tonight. I feel good about this decision. Which is definitely progress for me. Before I would feel guilt-stricken and worry that I would fall off the wagon. Not this time. I know that tomorrow I will be well rested to pick it back up and my body will thank me for it!

I did manage to stay completely on track on my birthday a couple days ago. I was worried I would cave in to some sort of cheat food, but I didn't. I gave myself the greatest gift this year: the gift of health. So we went bowling and even though T and EB had pizza, I had nothing. We went to the movie theater and saw How to Train Your Dragon 2 (AWESOME movie by the way!) and I got water. I ate a very late lunch after we got home and then T made a fabulous supper of walleye, shrimp, and asparagus while I did yoga.

I even got flowers! And of course a turtle! :)

All in all I had a pretty great day. There were some frustrating parts to it, but aren't there always? I managed to get out of my funk and enjoy my day even though it was Father's Day too. I got to spend some extra time with N that evening as well too.

So now I have one more round of the 21 Day Fix to do before PiYo comes out and that will be my program for the remainder of the summer. I am thinking that I will hit my 140s goal by the end of this week, which has me super excited! And I know that PiYo will get me to my ultimate goal by the end of the summer. I just can't wait to see what that looks like! Having not been this size in years, I am almost nervous about what that looks like, but that's for another post!

My Birthday Goal

Every single January for the last 10 years I have set a goal to reach by my birthday which is June 15th. I always think that because I have half the year to get to the goal that I should be able to achieve it. Every year it is exactly the same goal. For 10 years I have failed every single time. I gave up for so many reasons: it was too hard, I can't really reach it because I am not supposed to, I get comfortable where I am at, I don't want to put the work into reaching it. You name it and I used it as an excuse. You would think that eventually I would quit setting the goal, but not me! Every year it was the same thing. And every year I would be frustrated that I could not commit enough to myself to achieve this one "simple" thing.

My goal each and every year is to reach the 140s by my birthday. Sounds easy enough, right? At the beginning of each year I would weigh anywhere between 170-195 and I figured that I could lose that much by my birthday, if I really put my mind to it. The only problem was that I never really fully could put my mind to it. I have tried so many diets, so many programs. Some worked and some didn't. I found that I loved running, but never really stuck to it for a long enough period of time. I couldn't stick to a workout program for longer than 2 weeks. I was fed up with myself, with my own lack of self-control.

This year has been different. I set my goal once again. I was around 180 pounds at the beginning of January. I gave up gluten again (yes, I have a gluten intolerance) which had been an easy way to drop weight in the past. I lost about 5 pounds and then nothing. I went back and forth with it, but I felt so much better when I was off of gluten that eventually I stuck with it. I started running and I started the 30 Day Shred by Jillian Michaels. I received a Body Media Fit for Christmas and started tracking everything. Nothing. I was around 170-175 and nothing I did could get me under that. I did a USANA Reset again, which I have had success with in the past. Again nothing changed. People were commenting that I looked great, that I was fading away but I didn't see it because the scale wasn't changing. I was frustrated beyond belief, but this time I DID NOT GIVE UP!

I was on Facebook one day in February and there was a suggested post about a program called the 21 Day Fix. I thought it was a scam so I ignored it. A few days later it was there again, so I left a comment for Colin and he responded with a Facebook message. He asked me all these questions about myself, how much time I had to workout, what I had tried before, and tried to find out if the program would work for me. I loved the idea of it, but when it came down to it, I couldn't afford it. So I told him I had to wait. I put him off for a couple months. Then in April he posted that he was looking for coaches and that he could only take on 4 new coaches to mentor. I was intrigued. I want to help people. I want to show people how to eat healthy, how to BE healthy. How can I do this when I am not there myself? So I messaged him and said I was interested and was now ready to start the program. I have never been so excited and passionate about a decision. I know it was the right choice for me.

Since then I have now completed 2 rounds of the 21 Day Fix. My weigh in after 6 weeks of commitment:

Have I reached my goal of the 140s by my birthday this year? Well, not quite. Am I frustrated by that? HELL NO!!!! I am so excited that I have come this far! I can't wait to continue on and reach my goal within the next couple weeks as I commit to a third round of the 21 Day Fix. I am excited to see how I change as I start the newest program PiYo on July 7th. I am so glad that I didn't give up on myself this time. I deserve to be happy. I deserve to be healthy. And today I am definitely both of those. So Happy Birthday to me! I am finally becoming the person I am supposed to be!